i totally relate to the character pig pen! in fact, i think i am pig pen! when i'm out in public i almost feel obligated to shout, "unclean, unclean" - just like lepers had to do in biblical times. but you know, i'm pretty sure that would be unnecessary - i'm almost certain people can see the haze of germs hovering over me.
yesterday morning, i dragged myself out for my 20 minute walk...which in turn rendered me helpless on the couch for the following 6 hours. however, i am DETERMINED to do that walk - of course there is a balance between pushing my body too hard but i know, especially if this flare is part of a herx, that i have to do what i can to assist my overburdened body and sluggish lymphatic system in cleaning house of the dead bacteria. short term pain for long term gain. i know it will help in the long run.
my walks are done in the park that is directly in front of our house. the park is really a big wide open field and most of the path that i walk on is visible from our balcony. normally, i take my cell phone with me - just in case of emergency (sometimes i've ended up having an 'epidsode' mid-walk and am too weak to walk home). i don't generally turn my cell on unless i need to use it (i have a limited cell phone plan) but yesterday, i felt so unstable that i turned it ON because i was concerned at the possibility of becoming either mentally or physically incapable of turning it on and calling for help. yes, it is ridiculous that i went out in this state but doing life this way is the norm. it is called survival, i'm used to it. oh, the stories i could tell...
anyway here is the cool thing. because i turned my cell on, i got a message that i wouldn't have gotten otherwise. it was a text from taylor's girlfriend...a bible verse she had read that morning and had felt the need to share with someone. it's a total god thing that she chose to share it with me.
it was exactly what i needed to hear.
" Because of the LORD's great love we are not consumed,
for his compassions never fail.
They are new every morning; great is your faithfulness. "
for his compassions never fail.
They are new every morning; great is your faithfulness. "
God is utterly faithful - and His promises are reliable...even when we're in the pig pen...He is there in the filth, when we are being assaulted at every turn, are up to our necks in the guck and the yuck and are mired down by the impossibility of our circumstance.
yes, God is in the pig pen with us.
i'm grateful for the reminder via text.
i really needed it. this is shaping up to be the longest week on record.
1 comment:
Hang in there Shannon...your courage gives us courage to keep moving forward ~ one wobbly step at a time!
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